Today had one of those moments when I realized how very different I treat myself compared with how I treat others. This is neither good nor bad but just a simple observation. Case in point Eli, was eating a piece of candy when a piece of his tooth broke, I immediately jumped into action and had Eli at the dentist within 30 minutes. I on the other hand broke off half of one of my last molars over a year ago and it is still broken. I can’t seem to find the funds to get it fixed but if it was one of my kids I would beg, borrow, or steal to get it fixed for them. I haven’t had my hair done in over 6 months because it seems like a waste of money to spend when we are trying to get debt free. Not to mention it is impossible to find 3 hours that I am not in charge of either my children or someone else’s, however I make sure Joe gets his hair cut every 8 weeks.
There are so many more of these examples of the things I don’t do for myself but I do for everyone else. There are also things I could never do because I would end up feeling guilty but for a friend or loved one I would say go for it. It is easy to say just do it get the tooth fixed, go to the salon, and spend some money on some new clothes. But really it isn’t that easy, not when you are a mother, or at least this mother. There is always something more pressing or more important. . Every purchase is always countered with is this really necessary and what will my family have to go without if I make this decision or how much longer will this selfish purchase keep us away from our much-needed family vacation. I have a feeling that there will be plenty of time for fixing teeth, even if it requires dentures, or afternoons at the beauty parlor when my kids are grown and off sacrificing for their own families. Until then I will eat soft food, invest in bobby pins, and the ever necessary wine.